I'm still around but haven't felt much like writing and haven't really had the time if I did. Thank you to everyone who has written asking after me. Monday I received some not great news when I saw a specialist in Nashville but I'm trying to stay positive. My illness has worsened but there's still apparently another treatment option left to consider. If I haven't improved in a month then that's what will happen next.

When I feel a little better, I'll post more. I just wanted to explain my absence.

Thursday Ramblings

I'm not sure why I chose this photo for today's entry other than I just like it. Is it me or is there a bit of a FemDom air about this picture?

Mostly this entry is an update for my friends as I haven't had time to write to each of you. My mom doesn't have cancer - whew. Some misinformation combined with quite a bit of anxiety led us to suspect she may have. She is having some medical issues but I believe them all to be managable. Dad is doing fairly well. He had blood work done before his chemo today and it all looked good everything considered. Bill spend some time in the ER over the weekend but he's doing better now and enjoying his week. As for me, I'm still battling extreme fatigue and pain in my abdominal region, but I believe that my medication should start helping soon.

I've continued on with my workouts at the health club for the sake of both my physical well-being and my sanity ;) I need some time away just for me and this has become my time. Right now I'm working out only in the pool and with a bit of walking around the track. My knee is a lot better (yay) thanks to all this. The combination of the decrease in pain and my enjoyment of my time with my new workout buddy/friend, Rob, have helped keep me going.

Rob's a little nice man, a little older than me, who also has a knee injury. We work out together and he's been helping me strengthen my swimming techniques (I can swim, but I've never been a really strong swimmer). Apparently like everyone else he has a lot of stressors in his life but we've made a pact. At the club, we only talk about fun, meaningless, non-stressful things. Yesterday I briefly mentioned hypnosis just to feel out his reaction. To my surprise he was quite open-minded about it and even commented that he had considered seeing a hypnotherapist to help him deal with the pain associated with his knee injury. I didn't mention my umm.. talent.. in that department because I wasn't sure if he would feel that was appropriate for our dynamic. After thinking more about it I've decided that I will simply mention I have had some experience with trance and let him lead from there. (Letting him lead - now that's unusual for me ;) ). If he's comfortable, I'll consider finding a quiet spot there and hypnotizing him. We'll see.

Speaking of working out - it's that time. I'll write more soon.

Hope you are all well. I miss reading your blogs and your emails. Susan, if you read this, please leave a comment and let me know you're ok. I know you're in the Mid-West and lots of scary weather related things have been happening in the Mid-West recently.

My Relaxing Moments

Blake was totally kicking it on American Idol the other night, wasn't he? Takes a lot of guts to do a Bon Jovi song but he was great.

(Just thought I'd let you know I was relaxing a bit ;) )

Busy Week But a Few Relaxing Moments

Just wanted you to know I am trying to take at least some time for me. I just watched this last week's American Idol (thank you TiVo). Can't believe Phil went down but I have no doubt this guy will have a great career. I'll certainly buy his first CD.

Robert, my American Idol buddy, were you surprised? Who do you think will make it to the end? Who should? Any other Idol fans?

BTW, wasn't Bon Jovi great?



Didn't Blake do a kicking job on this? Great beatbox.

I'm Still Around

Thank you to everyone who has written and inquired about my silence over the last couple of weeks. I haven't written because, to be honest, I feel as if I spend way too much time talking about the stressful things in my life and all I can think about at the moment are the stressful things in my life. I don't want to be a complainer - thus the silence.

Since so many have asked, I'll explain a few things. I have a chronic illness in which there are periods of remission and then times of acute activity. When this illness becomes active I'm in a lot of pain and am very, very tired all the time. It's not a contagious illness so thankfully it doesn't prevent me from working. Right now I am in an acute phase. Additionally, on top of Bill and Dad both having cancer and me being sick, we've started having some problems with my mom. She's having tests and I've been very afraid that she has some type of bone cancer. Now, mind you, there's no proof of that - I've just gotten worked up about it. Hyper worry seems to happen in some people when they're already way overstressed and I seem to be one of those people .

All in all my mind is just in overload. I've stopped responding to emails, or group messages, and I've decided to give the blog a rest until things are a little better. I am coming back. This is not an abandonment of my blog, my group or my friends.

At any rate, I wanted those of you who cared to know I hadn't disappeared. I'll write as I can. I hope you're well and I do think of many of you often.