Dearest Pet

Today marks the third consecutive day I've permitted your release.

So many men profess a decrease in their desire to serve and to please after they are permitted to spill their seed. How delighted I am that you remain focused on your submission to me regardless of the amount of pleasure your (My) cock receives. Do you know how much this excites me? Even as I type I feel my body responding.

I'd like for you to disrobe now and don my collar. Lie back on your bed and begin to tease your body while the fingers of my control caress your mind. Tease until you are breathless... writhing... moaning... aching. Oh yes, how I love it when you're right on the edge.. so desperate to plunge into the glory of release. Slow your teasing when you near the brink and lie for a few moments, relishing in the dominance of your body and your mind. Finish by listening to Red Silk, obeying and releasing at my command. Seal the moment by slipping your index finger down to capture a bit of your come. Taste my control.

Hypnosis In the Movies

Is there any wonder so many people have a distorted view of hypnosis? I thought you hypnofetishists would find this amusing.

Does anyone know the name of the blonde or the name of this movie?

Mid Night Ramblings

I had a few scattered things to post, so I'm lumping them together in this post.

Sue, love your blog. You're a wonderful writer! I had the delicious experience of having some of your work read to me last night when I was in the throes of insomnia and it was such a delightfully pleasant experience that I found I was relaxed and able to sleep a couple of hours. Many thanks to you and to the sexy-voiced sweetheart who read to me. Your stuff has a lovely erotic flavor and it's wonderful to see that your enjoying yourself.

Pleaseletme, if you read this note and wouldn't mind, please contact me. Does anyone know if pleaseletme began a new blog? I cannot locate the URL but I seem to vaguely remember mention of it. (Sorry pleaseletme - so much going on here right now that I forget a lot of things.)

News for my friends about my father. The visit to the Cancer Research Center went well all things considered. Although the news wasn't great, it was much better than what we anticipated. Thanks for your support and prayers. I cannot tell you how much it has meant to me and to my family.

Regarding any emails any of you may have sent in the past 3-4 days - I'll get to you soon. Promise :)

Mind Control

It's almost 1am here in the City. I'm lying alone on a rock hard bed in a hotel room, unable to sleep. Poor planning on my part, huh? ;)

Yesterday I didn't have time to share this story so I thought I'd use this insomniac moment to my advantage and tell you about it.

About 3:00 or 3:30 in the morning Sunday I heard very loud knocking on my bedroom door. Thinking Bill was ill and needed me, I jumped up and rushed to the door, tripping over the tangle of covers from my bed as I did. When I yanked open the door, there stood Bill with a big goofy grin on his face.

Breakfast. He wanted to go out for breakfast.

After inquiring after his sanity, I grudgingly agreed. Going out and having someone serve me was certainly better than me having to cook it myself and I was just thrilled that the side effects from his last round of chemo had worn off enough that he felt like going. Making a mental note to order up a houseboy to do future cooking and chores, I trudged out to the car behind him.

Have you ever been to Denny's (or some place similiar) at 3:30 in the morning? What an interesting array of characters one finds at that time of the night. A table full of rowdy young fellas were seated just behind us and across the way a couple that I'm almost certain was a M/f couple. He declined table service from the waitress, informing her that "my girl will come to the counter to pick up our order to save your steps." Girl jumped up a couple of times to get things and when she returned, she would stand quietly awaiting his nod of permission before sitting. Since I live in a not-very-large Southern town, it's almost unheard of to see anything openly D/s, but I suppose if I paid more attention I would catch the less overt examples like this one. It felt nice to watch them.

As we sat there awaiting our order, I was grumbling a bit in fun about Bill being a thoughtless boss for dragging me out of my nice warm bed when I was so sleepy. He laughingly remarked that perhaps my sleepy state would allow him to turn the tables for once, affording him the opportunity to hypnotize me. We continued to tease back and forth about hypnosis and what each of us would do to the other when we heard a fairly loud comment come from one of the fellas sitting at the table behind us.

It was his "very educated" opinion that only weak-willed and not very intelligent people could be hypnotized or have their minds controlled. No one would ever be able to hypnotize him or control his mind. Bill laughed and kicked me under the table. Apparently this was too good for him to resist.

He turned and informed the Arrogant One (as I began to refer to him in my mind) that I was an excellent hypnotist and that I could most certainly hypnotize him. The Arrogant One again asserted that he was far too intelligent and strong willed for his mind to be controlled.

Smiling slowly I remarked that numerous studies had shown that someone extremely intelligent and strong willed was in fact the absolute best subject due to their vast understanding and imagination. (A bit exaggerated but hey, I was having fun toying with this guy.) His buddies began to goad the Arrogant One, remarking that surely he would be the best hypnosis candidate possible. Surely he wouldn't be afraid to have a woman control his mind long enough to hypnotize him?

What could he say or do? His arrogant mind would allow for nothing less than for him to be hypnotized so he grudgingly agreed. Smiling, I did a movie version induction (the sort that is comprised of three or four sentences and would hypnotize absolutely no one. ) Very quickly he was "under". He followed all my suggestions: barking like a dog, talking like a girl to his buddy, and being the "maid" by cleaning up their table. When he was finished being my "hypnotized subject", I "brought him up".

"1, 2, 3, 4, 5 - wide awake and revert to normal."

The Arrogant One opened his eyes and grinned, remarking that he had fooled me by pretending. "I told you I was too smart and strong willed for you to control my mind."

Smiling in response I replied. "Of course you were. I certainly never controlled your mind when you were barking like a dog, talking like a girl to your friend, or cleaning this table like a maid. You would have done all that yourself if I hadn't been here..."

Arrogant men. So many strings begging to be tugged.

Intermission

I straighten the red satin sheets
that I have just washed
and put the pillows in place.
I collect the whips, restraints,
and the mask She wore
on Her face. Each of these
I clean and arrange in
the appropriate way
while not yet touching
the audio tape She left
for me to play.
The smell of Her body
and Her scent remains
in the air, overpowering me
occasionally and sending
me into trance. Finally,
I am done and all has been
prepared according to
Her plan. My body shivers
as I take the tape and return
to reinforce Her mind control
in that special chair in my room.
And every moment, while I go
deeper than deep, more
submissive than ever before,
I ache and suffer with need
and arousal. Please, please may
She appear to use me again soon.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

I adore william's poetry and found this one to be especially beautiful. It's an indescribable feeling to have someone create such beauty especially for me. Thank you, sweet friend - you're very special.

Charm School Drop-Outs

" I mean this very respectfully. Why do you post those negative comments? You are above all that." - Anonymous Commenter

When I began this blog I resolved not to be a person who censored comments in order to generate the illusion that I was always right. Frankly, my ego is strong enough that I don't have to do things like that. I also possess the intelligence and strength to maintain an open mind without letting someone else fill it with crap.

I believe there's actually a more interesting question. Why would someone make such malicious attacks against anyone? The internet seems to have unleashed a legion of social misfits who have no idea how to communicate with simple courtesy. They cannot simply disagree with ideas, they must attack the individual. They're filled with "courage" and say things with no self-censoring whatsoever because they're not face-to-face with their targets. Whether these individuals are bullies, someone possessing the self-esteem of a toad, or simply charm-school drop-outs, it doesn't really matter in the end. Their remarks are a reflection on the person they are, not on the person they attack.

I genuinely feel sorry for them.

The Great Question

The great question - which I have not been able to answer - is, "What does a woman want?" - Sigmund Freud

As you have no doubt surmised, being a dominant woman in a relationship with a submissive man has many perks ;) Near the top of the list is the awareness we each hold that I am going to be far less reticent to ask for what I want and will do so in a far more direct manner than women who aren't dominant. My confidence is not only in myself, but in him - in his desire to hear what I want and his eagerness to make sure I have it.

Sounds pretty simple, right? Admittedly, in most situations, it is. Where it sometimes gets tricky is in addressing those things that are sensitive issues for him - those areas where I know I'll hurt him by being honest. Even though I want what I want, I am not about to plunge in and blithely disregard his feelings. Regardless of the stereotype, I don't believe being a dominant women gives me license to behave like a heartless bitch. That sort of demeanor works fine in fantasy and even in some areas of play, but he's the person I love. I don't want to hurt him. My silence, however, hurts me.

I'm facing one of those situations. Talking is the only solution. I know this, so it's what I will do. It helps knowing we have a firm foundation based on our feelings for one another. Also comforting is the knowledge that, thanks primarily to our power-exchange dynamic, we've built a strong relationship structure on top of that foundation. That dynamic was our vehicle to finding a place where we feel safer with one another and are more respectful, honest, and open than I believe we would have been without it. Of course these aren't things that are limited to power-exchange relationships, but it's been what helped us find that place. Even though talking about potentially hurtful things isn't easy now, it would have been impossible for me if circumstances were different.

Why post this? Essentially because with regard to Femdom, (LFA, D/s whatever you choose to call it) relationships, most of what one hears about or reads are the positive, fun, sexy stories. As it should be - it's a fun, sexy lifestyle for those it "fits" and those are the stories we love to tell. Still, it's important to recognize it's not always a piece of cake for either party. For us, this lifestyle helps strengthen our relationship, but no matter how you slice it, life's messy. It's full of imperfect people living imperfect lives doing the best they can to be as happy as possible.

Wonder Woman

After reading Helpmate Hubby's recent post on comic book Villainess "Star Sapphire", I remembered an interesting article I'd read a few months ago. "Truth, Dominance, and the American Way" details the origin and life of comicbook-land's most famous superherione, Wonder Woman. Among the article's more interesting tidbits is the revelation that WW creator William H. Marston was a practicing psychologist who focused some of his research on the influence of dominance and submission on emotional states. If you're a comic fan, you might really enjoy that article.

I remember reading Wonder Woman comics when I was growing up and also recall pretending to be Wonder Woman while playing Superfriends with my brothers and the boys in our neighborhood. Funny how our play as children can be a predictor of some of our adult personality traits.

Earlier today my brother called and shared that Josh Whedon (of Angel and Firefly fame) was currently directing his screenplay version of Wonder Woman. He reminded me that I'd had a fondness even then for the "lasso of truth". What a pity I don't have one of those today! ;) Little does he know that I have put my Wonder Woman and Evil Cowgirl skills to good use!

Perspective

Who names the twilight all down to the ground?
Who counts the shadows and who sings the night?
There are mysteries that leave neither sound
nor traces behind in their secret flight.
The forest air is sharp upon the skin
when autumn bows and gives way to winter.
White moonlight makes this small clearing begin
to glow and shine but the cold is bitter.
The old magic from ancient days and times
survives here to renew the world’s dreaming.
There is power without measure that finds
the truth without sympathy or meaning.
We are accidents in this universe
just trying to make things better, not worse.

(c)2006, william the submissive poet

Rituals

Rituals. We all have them. Perhaps they don't have a D/s flair, but they are a part of our lives. It could be something as simple as having a glass of wine with every Thanksgiving meal or reading "Twas the Night Before Christmas" every Christmas Eve. These activities mean something to us that really can't always be explained, but the feelings associated with them are deep and satisfying. When I began to realize the place dominance and submission held in my intimate relationships, I didn't really have a desire to establish any sort of rituals. While I could easily grasp the place rituals held outside my relationships and could remember with fondness the joy they bring, I suppose I thought such things in an adult, intimate relationship were just a little silly. However, as I've mentioned before with other things, as time passed I began to find my interests changing and I discovered just how wrong I was.

Our rituals are pretty simple, really. Things that I've asked him to do that remind him of me and of my control even on those days when I'm not physically close. It's been a while now so I can't remember which ritual even came first. I think it was the wearing of his (my) cock collar. It's a bit of leather that encircles his cock and fastens with a bit of velcro. He wears it every time he leaves home. It's not painful or humiliating. In fact, no one but he and I even know it is there. It's nice, because it's a reminder that it doesn't matter where he is or where I am, my control is always there. It's not a flashy ritual, but it's something that means a lot to both of us.

Another of my favorites is a ritual that involves doing his dishes. He dons his neck collar and an apron and for the longest time that was all he wore while doing them. Something simple. (Smiles) I like closing my eyes at some point during the day and picturing this. I especially like it because I love his naked behind. Mmm mmm. I love knowing it's mine. Not too long ago, we added the wearing of the ball parachute pictured above. The leather encircles his balls and the chains swing against his legs as he moves. He wears it without the weight during this time so it doesn't cause any pain or discomfort (that's not the goal of my rituals.) The parachute simply serves as a lovely dangling reminder of my control.

There are other things. We don't often speak of any of them. In fact, until today, it's been quite some time since they were mentioned. Even though it's a matter of routine that he does them, it's something that he cherishes and it's something that still serves to excite him. As for me, I think about these things every day as well. Even though I don't often say it to him, these examples of his devotion and his obedience touch something very deep within me.

I'm very lucky to have him.

Bedtime Stories

Sue writes, "I've always thought erotica is best shared. I think it’s very intimate to read a sensual passage to your lover, especially one you've written. While my talents as a writer are admittedly extremely modest, I love to write little stories for my husband Tyler and read them while we’re snuggled in bed."

This is something I really enjoy as well. It's a wonderful way to share fantasies with one another. Often my stories will end up being very vivid trances ;) Since Rook's a gifted story teller, he often pleases me by reciprocating. After reading Sue's latest work, I know what story he'll be hearing tonight!

Nice, Sue - very nice!

Faking It

I was reading a survey in which over 80 percent of women and up to 40 percent of men indicated they had faked an orgasm at least once. While I wasn't too surprised at the numbers of women responding in the affirmative, I was by the numbers of men. I thought I'd post a poll to check some numbers, but I'd also like to solicit comments asking those who vote "yes" to share their reasons why (feel totally free to leave anonymous comments on this one if you'd like).

I usually don't pass on things like this but I thought maybe someone else was having a tough day and could use a smile. Thanks Will for sharing.

________________

Partial description of video from You Tube.

Sometimes, a hug is all what we need. Free hugs is a real life controversial story of Juan Mann, A man whos sole mission was to reach out and hug a stranger to brighten up their lives.

In this age of social disconnectivity and lack of human contact, the effects of the Free Hugs campaign became phenomenal.

As this symbol of human hope spread accross the city, police and officials ordered the Free Hugs campaign BANNED. What we then witness is the true spirit of humanity come together in what can only be described as awe inspiring. (find the remainder at You Tube

Perfect Focus

Your words control my senses.
All I can see is You and yet only
when it pleases You.
I smell Your perfume, a powerful aphrodisiac,
dry and sophisticated, almost decadent,
subtle and overwhelming.
I hear Your whispers and words,
rhythms and silences, controls and echoes.
Your trigger rhymes become a spreading infection
of incurable insatiable devotion.
My touch is frustrated by the hypnotic strength
of Your invisible bondage, a prison of silk
veils that paralyzes as it caresses.
I imagine that I taste the sweet salt sweat
on Your skin as You climax again and again.
I am what You have made me and what
You wanted me to be. You have made me into
what I never dared hope to be.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

Saturday This and That

I thought I'd write a mid-day entry about the variety of things that are going through my mind right now. When my thoughts are jumbled, writing helps me get organized.

We had some pretty bad news yesterday about my Dad - totally out of the blue which made it a much bigger blow to bear. I was pretty upset for awhile but the more I've been thinking about it the more I realize how much of my life I've been putting on hold for the past six-eight months. Even though my schedule is going to be tight, I need to keep doing the things I love. Carpe Diem and all that jazz ;)

Last night I was thinking about how submissive men are often viewed as weak by people from outside the FemDom lifestyle - a perception that is far from the truth. Certainly there are weak submissive men but there are weak men who are "Doms", vanilla, or whatever. It's times like this that I really appreciate the strength that my submissive man possesses. When your man says with loving calmness, "whatever you need, whatever I can do - I am here for you," it makes even really tough things seem a little more bearable. I love it that he doesn't have some crazy "Dommes are always strong, Dommes never make mistakes, Dommes are basically perfect" mentality.

He's been doing more shopping. Since he hates to shop and he sounded so excited when he told me this last night, I can only assume he is shopping for some more fun stuff like the opera gloves. He did tell me this time not to open the package in front of Bill (poor Bill, he's a dear and I love him to pieces, but I'm not sure he's ready for me to open a package in front of him and have a bunch of really kinky stuff fall out). I could have instructed Rook to tell me what he bought but he was having a pretty good time teasing me with his secret. Someone asked me earlier what I thought about submissives teasing Dommes and I didn't think to share this story with him. Sometimes being teased like this is fun. It's just good to know I am in a position to end it whenever I wish ;)

In other areas of interest to me, I've added some new blogs to my "blogs I read" list on the sidebar. Some I've been reading for awhile and I have no idea why I failed to list them til now. If your write a blog and it's not listed, write to me and let me know. I only keep active blogs (those who have entries within the last 30 days) listed here but on my Mesmerizing Women of the Web site I list sites that are not as active.

There's more floating around in my mind to share but I've been interrupted 5-6 times already so I think it's time to close my computer and get busy doing other things.

Who's Who

For those who are new to reading my blog it is sometimes difficult to figure out who is who in my life. Here's a brief rundown:

I'm a RN and I do live-in care for Bill, a man who is battling lung cancer. I've been taking care of him for a couple of years now so we're very close - pretty much like family. Rook, my boyfriend (at 44, I dislike that term and thus often refer to him as my fella), lives about six hours drive away from me. Long distance relationships are not fun but as long as I'm working for Bill I won't be moving. Graham is Bill's best friend and a very good friend to me as well. Since I've developed a chronic illness and on rare occasions need help with Bill or shopping, etc, Graham has pitched in. We couldn't have made it without him and we love him to pieces.

I have a number of very special friends as well and from time to time I'll mention them by name. I'd list them all, but I am afraid I'll leave someone out. Suffice it to say I know I'm a blessed person to have so many wonderful people in my life.

Wait... What Product Were They Selling??

For some reason I can't remember.

Random Thoughts About Blogs and Blogging

The number of really interesting blogs out there just keeps growing. I found a couple more today that I really enjoyed and will probably add to my "blogs I read list" over the weekend. It's great to see so many people willing to express their thoughts and share their experiences. Surely readers can find a few with which they identify no matter how mild or intense their kink.

Those blogs that have been around for awhile continue to offer some top quality posts and I'm loving reading. As you peruse these sites, do you ever find yourself thinking "I really want to comment but all I can think of to say is - "great entry" or "I can so identify"? I do. Sometimes I'll leave brief remarks, but more often than not I'm silent and I think most people are probably the same way. Sadly this leads to some very quiet comments sections on some great blogs, perhaps leaving their owners with the thought that their entries aren't enjoyed by their readers. Perhaps we who enjoy these gems should leave kudos even if that is all that we say? I don't know. What do you think?

On a more technical note, has anyone had difficulty with blogger accepting photos? I have had to resort to uploading them to my website and then using that URL to place my photos.

That was a really jumpy entry - hopping from one thing to the next with a very weak seque, but I'm in a hurry and it'll have to do for now ;) I'm off to make a phone call and then head to the Dr with my Dad.

Trojans

Hey all my computer savvy friends, I have a couple of questions. When I go to a small site maintained by an individual, if their site main page causes my virus program to issue a warning that a trojan has been found, then:

a: does it mean there really is a trojan on that page or can it be my virus program just being picky, and

b: does the person who own the site necessarily have to know the trojan thing is there for it to be there?

That's 3am and no sleep language so if you don't understand, I'll try to ask it clearer tomorrow.

Her Instrument

submission
surrender
I connect to words
that control my meaning
slowly
quickly
down into nothing
down into me
guided
directed
pulled into eternity
erotic tension growing in me
empty
waiting
burning white hot to serve
patience will be learned
pleasure
pain
an endless kiss
my mind cannot resist
Her climax
in context
I am more than content
to be Her instrument

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

Black Widow

(Lady Julia's note: This story is a first effort for the author. It's sizzling hot so I believe you'll enjoy it. I'd love to give credit to him but he asks that this offering be made public without his name. Enjoy.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I am ready for my pet. The way has been prepared for a long time. The triggers are in place. Tonight he finally gets everything he wants, but not in quite the way he thinks…

Tonight I must succeed, finally to mate with the Black Widow after so many close calls and failures. I must carefully enter her web, relax her, and then mate. I must be careful or I will arouse her then I will surely be caught, and wrapped in her web forever…

I hear him approaching up the stairs. I relax myself and close my eyes to await his approach. I lie on my back, arms stretched out above me, legs slightly spread in my web. I have a soft bed with many soft things spread around. A combination of red and black satin pillows raised my middle just enough to entice him to me. My upper back, neck and brunette head are propped up slightly also on a couple of the many satin pillows. I am wearing my black corset with a deep red spider emblem pointed downward on the chest, moving the eyes subconsciously where he will eventually be drawn. My black thigh high nylons have a red stripe up the inside getting slightly narrower the higher up they go. My black gloves have holes just large enough for my red manicured nails to show through in the dim light…

I carefully look in the room. She is there, so vulnerable and relaxed. Her bed is shaped like the body of a spider. I notice her head is up near the front where the Black Widow's head would be, the large round body with plenty of room for me to climb on to the web and approach. I feel a slight shutter and I see the silky black legs hanging down from the bed, eight of them. The feeling quickly goes away, as if forgetting a bad memory or dismissing danger. I feel myself drawn to the web as I get down on my knees and quietly crawl to the edge of the bed…

I lie quietly, listening to his silent approach. My training is having an effect. He knows the danger. I open my eyes ever so slightly to confirm that he has the proper outfit – my soft sheer pink thong. It fits him perfectly as I am a couple of inches taller than my pet. I see that he is properly excited and ready as he approaches from the side…

I must carefully relax and bind my Black Widow so that I will be able to mate and escape. I reach down and grab a silky nylon and carefully tie her hand to one of the spider legs, all the while gently kissing her entire arm to relax her properly. I move carefully to the other arm and successfully tie that one as well. I take a moment to pause, letting her relax. I begin to feel a little intoxicated as the room begins to spin slightly. I barely discern a gentle tingling sweetness in my nose. I glance down her body briefly and see her beautiful brunette crown cleft. I glance away, but the aroma is getting strong. I must resist until I can tie her legs…

I know he is becoming more under my power. I can feel his hesitation, his resistance. But my excitement will be too much for him. Ohhh, I am sooo wet. Soon my pet…soon…as I smile evilly to myself as I sense the ever increasing conflict within him…

I must focus. I move down to kiss her legs, taking care to resist the ever increasing aroma that threatens to take over my senses. Her legs are so soft and smooth. I must resist for a little while longer. I manage to tie one leg with great effort. I work my way around to the other one and I feel her stir just a bit…I back off briefly, but she is still asleep. I manage to regain my focus and tie the other legs. My Black Widow is bound….

I am sooo wet now, my aroma fills the room. I barely open my eyes to notice him finishing up the final knot. If he only knew, I think to myself as I let myself smile a bit…

I look up and see her smile. She is very relaxed. I feel a sense of comfort and a strong urge to approach her. I can’t resist anymore, but she is ready and secure so I should be safe. I move up between those thighs, drawn to the intoxicating smell and beautifully crafted fleshy folds. I am inches from her, and all of a sudden all control is gone. I bury my face and tongue in her wetness…I lose all sense of being. I hear her moan with pleasure as she is aroused from her sleep. I am flying on air and I feel myself falling endlessly as her juices completely take me over. I can focus on nothing else. I am safely in heaven with her restrained…

I let my pet lick me to several orgasms, feeling waves and waves of pleasure from his expertly trained tongue as it buries itself inside me. I move with him. I don’t want it to end but it is getting close to time to turn the tables. I utter softly “my pet” and immediately my pet makes eye contact with me…

I feel a slight shiver as my eyes meet my now aroused Black Widow. I cannot break her gaze, and I lick her with even more intensity. I see her eyes widen and she utters several loud moans, all the while never loosening her gaze. I feel drawn to those eyes and I must try and finish before it’s too late. I move up her body and suckle on her nipples. I can’t control myself. She seems so relaxed even while restrained. In the back of my mind I sense some fear. Did I do something wrong? I can’t place my thoughts on it clearly, I am so intoxicated and beyond control. I am drawn to her mouth, still caught in her gaze as our lips meet. I try to mate, but I am frustrated. Everything should be correct, but something is wrong. I cannot escape her kiss or he gaze. I thrust more frantically than ever, but something is preventing me. I feel myself drifting under her control, and panicking all at the same time. I try harder…

I keep him locked in my kiss and gaze for a long time, until I am satisfied. I feel his useless thrusts on my mons. I change my angle upward so I feel more pleasure from his efforts. I feel waves of pleasure as his, now my, hard cock tries to escape the panty prison, but cannot. It’s a shame for him that he doesn’t know it’s there. I get wetter thinking about how frustrating it must be for him to be so close, to even feel my wetness on him, but unable to succeed. Don’t worry my pet -- you will, just not yet, I think to myself. My lift my arms free of the bonds. They where never tied, just wrapped at my suggestion. It’s amazing how easily my suggestions made him believe he had tied me. All the planning will now pay off. I loosen my legs as well. He doesn’t notice. I wait a few seconds longer, and then with my arms, I pin his arms to his sides and bend up my legs. I then pin his arms further with my legs. I quickly tie a sheer but strong pink nylon pantyhose wrap around each arm and then across the front and back effectively pinning his arms down to his sides. I quickly slide him up over me so my legs are wrapped around his and I tie his legs first at his knees and then at his ankles. Before he has a chance to think, I quickly slide on the red satin sheets out from under him, flipping him on his back, I am on top of him straddling his chest close to his head. I then take a very long piece of soft sheer nylon and twirl him under me wrapping him from head to toe. I stand up over him admiring my handiwork…

It all happened so fast. I thought I was succeeding but then unexplainable frustration. My mind starts to clear. I see a very beautiful Black Widow standing over me through the sheer fabric in which I am encased. She has won, but I feel safe somehow. I see her smiling in victory standing over me. I see a small drop descend from between her legs and hit me between my legs. I twitch against my soft bonds. I drift down to the subconscious as I see her kneel down and lean to my ear whispering…

‘Turnabout is fairplay’ I say softly in my pets ear. He instinctively turns over with my help and raises his middle in the air as much as he can. I place some pillows under his stomach and gently push him down so he is relaxed and exposed to me. I reach over the side of the bed for my black strap on which has one red stripe winding from the tip to the base for his submission, and a shorter similar one for me. I slip it on, feeling my part gently insert itself in to me -- I am more than wet enough. I squeeze on the inserted part, taking in the pleasure of it. I lubricate his submission end with warming gel and I separate the nylon around his exposed ass. I move the thong to the side and place the tip at the entrance, ready to take him. I whisper, ‘this is what you intended for me? I will take you first and make you mine’. I gently push my black and red member in to him, slowly, but deeply. It is a moderate size. I don’t intend pain for him, just control. I begin to thrust slowly…in and out…gently dominating and speaking softly to him about how he is my pet forever…

I am totally lost. My Black Widow has turned me over and I am tightly in her web, but I can’t remember just how. I settle down in a very soft and smooth relaxation. If feel a tingling from behind, and then a fullness that keeps coming and going. I hear her whisper, but I am too intoxicated and it’s too quiet for me to completely grasp. I feel myself slipping beyond control as the tingling from behind begins to intensify…

In and out….in and out…I continue gently. I reach around and feel my cock in a strong erection. I don’t stimulate it. I just feel for the precum that I expected to find. I sense his excitement as he submits to me, my thrusting taking him beyond control. After awhile, I see him start to tense up. I pull him up to me, my chest against his back, continuing to gently thrust deeply into him. I reach around to feel his soft prostrate orgasm release from my cock giving him just a little pleasure. I thrust for a few minutes longer to get him more excited. I push him back down, withdraw and cover him up. I flip him back over and prop his head up on a soft silky pillow. I uncover his eyes and mouth. I stand over him and slowly remove my harness, letting him see my vagina release the short black and red cock slowly. I look down, he is harder than ever. ‘Soon my pet…soooon’….I say…

So beautiful, I can think of nothing else but that beautiful glistening cleft over me. It gets closer and closer, but seems to take so much time…and no time. I am lost as the intoxicating aroma gets ever closer, and a drop hits my lips. I subconsciously take it in, the acid taste taking me further down. I get distressed as it seems to stay just out of reach. I barely perceive a black and red phallus being attached to my chin. She gets closer as black and red disappears into her pink beauty getting ever closer to me, slowly. Then it moves farther away, and my desire gets more intense with every stroke…in, and out…closer…farther. Some of her wetness leaks onto my lips, and I gladly take it in. Then heaven…

I thrust all the way down, allowing him to lick me. I gently ride him keeping my black and red member inside of me. He licks me with such intensity taking in all my juices. I have several orgasms before it’s over, each one more intense than the last. I glance back seeing my cock harder and already oozing. I slowly stand up and let him stare at the dildo for a few seconds. I remove it and straddle his encased cock, with one knee on the bed, and my right foot flat on the bed. I want him to see himself taken. I lean forward and cover his mouth, but I leave his eyes uncovered. He is so into me and I only getter wetter as I prepare to give him his dream...

Mmmmmmm, I am dizzy from excitement, it’s so timeless. I am so relaxed yet focused like never before…

I slowly expose my cock for final domination. I pull apart the bonds, and move the now soaking thong to the side. My cock glistens in the dim light. I pull it up toward my lips, barely touching my genitals, opened up like a flower from my excitement. I let the fleshy folds and wetness tease him. I see him flicker with excitement. ‘Soon my pet, soon’ I whisper…

I am so dizzy, I can’t make a clear thought as the reality sets in deeply that my beautiful Black Widow is about to make me hers forever, and I can do nothing about it...

I press him farther between my lips, teasing the end of my cock. He is mine. No power in the world could pull him from me now. I slowly place my cock, and him, inside me, being sure he can see every moment of himself being taken. I remain motionless for a time letting him feel the warmth of me and increasing our bond. He tries to thrust deeper, but I press down preventing him from moving. I am stronger, so he has no chance. He will just have to wait until I am ready. I slowly move up, my cock gradually falling out. He tries to stay in, but I press down on his pubis with one hand and he falls out. I slide up his chest leaving a wet streak that I know he can feel. I kiss him with my genital lips through the fabric that traps him. I remain still in a long kiss. He desperately tries to lick all he can through the sheer fabric. I tease him like this for a time, and finally remove the sheer nylon between us. I want a few more orgasms before I take him. He licks with abandon. I go back and forth from his face to my cock over the next couple of hours keeping him on edge and making him more mine...

I am happy that I exist for her pleasure. It’s so timeless and intoxicating…pure pleasure…

I put him inside me like I have been doing for the last couple of hours. But this time I squeeze him like I haven’t before. He lets out a moan of pleasure. I meet his gaze and lock it in. I put my other knee down and start to thrust slowly. ‘Stay still, it’s my time’ I say softly. He stops trying to thrust. I stroke him slowly…oh that hard cock feels so good. ‘You are mine…repeat it’ I say softly. He does. Again and again in unison with my thrusts he says it. I can see he is close, almost time for the final trigger…

My excitement is so strong, I feel like I am going to explode, but something is blocking my way…

Finally, I pull up slowly, and then I say ‘You are mine…forever’, and as I say 'forever', I squeeze and thrust down hard and I rub my clitoris myself. His orgasm starts immediately as does mine. This causes me to squeeze even harder. I take him thrusting up and down with full force through our orgasms which seem to last a very long time. Once he’s done, I slow down my thrusts and settle on him for a time…

I have never felt more pleasure, more dominated, more owned, in my life. My head is spinning, and I stare at the absolute beauty on top of, and controlling me…

I smile gently and knowingly. I move up and let our juices drain into his mouth. He licks and sucks gently, totally mine. I turn around, not losing contact with his lips, my cheeks smothering his eyes so he can’t see. I move a silky net underneath him and attach the ends to ropes and pulleys that I have attached to the ceiling. I begin to pull on the main rope and I hoist him out from under me and over my spider bed about three feet or so. I say quietly, ‘You are in my web, and will stay until the next time I need to feed’. With that, I lay back and go to sleep with my pet at my beck and call, tied up in my web.

I sleep like I have never slept before, so contentedly, so long. I am awakened by a soft voice that says, ‘You are mine, forever’.

Anonymous Comments

I thought I would take off the "approve comments" feature and see what would happen. I did this only last night and already the vultures are circling.

"It's ironic that your "changing focus" post is so obviously focused not on what you say you want but comes across as mostly a reaction to people who annoy you.

Something to consider: The negative emotions that we feel towards others (especially online) is not about the other person; in fact, what we perceive is our own mental construct and may have very little resemblence to the actual other person.

This fact is doubly true of all online acquaintances and long distance relationships; in most cases where we create drama, we are mostly shadow boxing with our own projected images."

Dear Anonymous Reader (Would never guess who you are ;) It's ok darlin' - your secret identity is safe with me).

You're projecting, Sweet Thing.

Changing Focus

Somehow over the last few months I've lost focus with my blogging. I started this journey primarily as a way to organize my thoughts about hypnosis, D/s, and the goings on in my life and my relationship. It also seemed an easy and fun way of communicating with my friends and with those people who shared similar interests. When surfing one day I discovered the blogs of a few others and in time I found myself penning posts in response to what I was reading. While there's nothing wrong with being inspired in that manner nor in standing up for what we believe, I've found that the pleasure I previously felt in online journaling has pretty much diminished. That probably makes no sense to most of you but my life's pretty tense and I really have no need to do something in my spare time that feels like a responsibility or like more work.

After thinking about this for a few days, I've decided that I'm going back to my old sources of inspiration. It's time to relax and enjoy myself like I did before. Besides, if I take myself too seriously, I'll start to look like a certain arrogant jackass some of us know and heaven only knows I couldn't stomach that ;)

Maybe you'll notice the change, maybe not. If you stick around for the ride - I'm glad you're here. If not, God bless and I hope you find what you seek. Either way, it's all good.

$$$ Winning the Lottery $$$

This week in my YahooGroup ginger asked, "If you won $250 million in the lottery and had to spend it all in one year without doing one altruistic thing what would you spend it on?"

I thought this was an interesting question and one that can really stir our imaginations if we let it. I realize many people think they are too giving to answer without listing altruistic things but I'm guessing most of us can let our imaginations run a bit wild if we try.

If I won and had to be totally selfish, I would:

Travel all over Western Europe, (stopping to meet all my friends there ;) Then travel to Australia, Hawaii, and come to think of it all over the US. Canada - ok, fine - a worldwide tour. First class all the way. I want champagne and strawberries and cushy seats. I'd have an entourage - someone to carry my luggage, a secretary to handle my appointments, etc.

I'd have private concerts done for me by Andrea Bocelli, Josh Groban, Sarah Brightman, Enrique Iglesias, Christopher Williams, Elton John, Bob Dylan, Nine Inch Nails, Lifehouse, Martina McBride, The Stones - that list could go on forever.

I'd take my friends and family with me for all of this. I don't consider that an altruistic act because it would be no fun to do this alone.

When I was done traveling, I'd build a really big house with tons of bedrooms and then I'd adopt ten kids. I'd hire nannies and housekeepers to do the icky stuff and then I'd get to do all the fun stuff with them. We'd go to amusement parks and pro ballgames. We'd have the best seats possible and get to meet all our favorite players. Best of all I'd be a mom.

I'd commission a series of books by F. Paul Wilson about a strong, sexy woman who unravels the story behind all these mysterious happenings. Her name of course would be Julia (wink).

I'd have a second house - like this one. It would have a dungeon equipped with all my favorite things from my favorite toy site. (This particular site has very expensive but totally classy looking stuff.) I'd also have several things custom built as I have some ideas for things that I've never really seen.

HELP - by this time I've run out of money!!

If you let your imagination roll - spending $250 million totally selfishly is really possible! What would you spend your money on?

The Real Reason Women Like to Shop

How To Get A Domme

Thanks ginger for sending this :)

Her Words

I can almost see My words sink slowly into you.
Your face is blank and your eyes see
only the visions that I conjure for My amusement.
In the fantasy, I am your sorceress of power.
I control your universe with magic and mystery
and you worship Me as an erotic and wicked deity.
My oiled and perfumed finger traces a line
languorously down the vertebrae of your naked spine
leaving a growing weakness that follows behind.
I have changed your whole subjective reality
into one that is only centered around Me.
It is much too late for any thought of withdrawal now.
It is impossible for you to change back to what you were.
I have burned your bridges with the raging fires
of your secret fetishes and perversions stoked
to an intensity that destroys all possible thought.
You are mine to do with as My whims might move Me.
You have been shaped though My irresistible subversion.
Come here now and pleasure Me.

by william the submissive poet

This and That

My friends have been working hard to cheer me up (and doing a wonderful job I might add:) David sent this:


I just really like that David ;) I think I want a poster of that!

Bob's answer: Because she smells like a new truck!

(Smiles - thanks Bob for the joke. It is a joke, right?)

For those of you who have been wondering...

My father was able to go back to work this week. He's not feeling well but he really wanted to go back to work and I think the mental health benefits of getting out of the house is a really good thing.

Bill (my patient, boss, and my dear friend) is holding his own. His mood is brighter and he's doing some of the things he's been wanting to do for awhile. He's building each of my nieces and nephews a "cool box". They're boxes with many draws and storage compartments to hold all their cool treasures. Who knows what will end up in there :)

Rook (my boyfriend) has moved to a new apartment and is settling in. If things work out, I'm going to visit in a couple of weeks. Right now I'm ill again and not able to fly. I have good motivation to feel better though! We have all these new toys to use and they're just calling to me ;)