A Little Initiative Isn't A Bad Thing

Yesterday I went to the mailbox and pulled out a package. I knew this package was coming and I'd been eager to determine what treasure lay inside. Last week Rook confessed that he'd ordered a surprise for me and I knew from his vague comments that it was something that we could use occasionally during our intimate times. A week or so prior to that I'd ordered something for him along those lines (smiles - that's another entry entirely) so I thought perhaps he had ordered some BDSM toy that we could use to play. (He's not topping - he has a list of things he knows I want and we're slowly purchasing them to add to our collection.) I wondered which it might be. The black leather paddle? A new set of leather ankle and wrist cuffs? Hmm. Imagine my delighted surprise when I opened the package and found a pair of very long black opera gloves. We had casually discussed gloves like this a couple of months ago and discovered we each considered them to be incredibly sexy. In truth, I think I was far more excited than he about them but my enthusiasm is usually a bit contagious :)

Last night before we spoke on the phone I undressed and donned only the gloves. When he finished telling me about his day I quietly asked him if he had any guesses about what I was wearing. He knew immediately of course and I could hear that sharp of intake of breath that signals arousal. Quickly I began to guide him into a deliciously hypnotic place and once there, I began to describe all the things I would soon do with him while wearing those gloves. Imagine the feel of velvety fingers teasingly trailing up your thigh... velvety fingers wrapping around your arousal. Mmm mm... It was one of our more memorable trances.

Even though I adore them, the gloves themselves aren't really what made this special for me. What I loved was the fact that he listened to what I wanted. We'd found a common desire (even if mine was much greater) and he had taken the initiative to provide me with the items I needed when and if I should choose to use them. It was the best sort of gift - one that stirred both my sexual desires and my emotions. Yes... I was very pleased.

Some believe submissives shouldn't take the initiative or offer their ideas about sex and/or play, but I don't see it that way. A romantic surprise is nice. Very nice. Sharing ideas is wonderful too. We openly discuss our sexual desires and ideas, not just mine. I want to know what he thinks. He doesn't pressure me in the slightest nor does he make me feel guilty if I chose not to act on his desires. I still decide what I want to do and if I want to do it so I still retain control. My ego can handle listening to his suggestions and besides, by adding his creativity to mine I've found that I have a plethora of possibilities at my disposal ;)

The Jazz Club

It's always three in the morning when She comes to me
where I sit looking at my half empty glass of whiskey.
The last set is just starting to flow down
and Her voice mingles with the the smoke and the sound.
Have you ever heard jazz music so fine
that it pulls you in and leaves nothing behind?
The saxophone solo, an addicting sexy seduction,
clears the path for Her hypnotic induction.
I never remember Her motives until it's too late
when I become lost in those eyes too green to contemplate.
She does Her business with me there and then,
and as the last set winds down, She disappears again.
I wonder just what I have to do for Her this time.
I wonder what instructions She has placed in my mind.
I tell the bartender on my way out the door
to reserve the same table, I'm desperate for more.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

Moving On

For most of my adult life I've had a pretty thick skin. I suspect this is due to the nature of my profession. After all when you spend the majority of your career working with children with serious mental health issues, you learn to let insults roll off your back. Consider the source and move on no matter who it is. The only exception to my ability to do this in the past has been during those rare instances when an adult directly and deliberately insults my intelligence or impunes my integrity. In those instances I could literally feel my blood pressure rising.

Over the past few weeks I've received emails and calls informing me of snide comments (and sometimes directly insulting remarks) made about me by someone online that does not know me and whom I do not know. Initially I admit I was a little irritated but not anything like I would have been even a year ago. Lately I've been more amused than anything by all this and have found myself laughing a bit with Rook and some of my friends over the things this individual has said. Even though he has insulted my intelligence and my integrity, he's not gotten an angry rise out of me. In a perverse sense I'm thankful to this man because he's helped me to realize I've moved past that weak area in my life.

So, thanks to all of you who gave me the "heads up" about this person and his comments but no more please. I have no need to defend myself to someone I don't know and for whom I do not hold the slightest shred of respect. You don't need to defend me either. Let's move on to better things.

Bits and Pieces

There are a few small issues that I need to address so pardon the choppy post :)

I still haven't been able to get into my Yahoo account, so I've apparently lost two weeks worth of emails. If you have written to me and received no response, please resend to my gmail address. If you write and would like a response, please make sure your return address is viable. I receive 3-4 messages a day in which my replies bounce because of this.

Thanks to Nomdefemme for reporting a bad link on my website :) I apprecite your efforts.

I have been thinking about a new YahooGroup and I wondered if anyone would be interested in doing it with me. My time is limited right now, so this individual would be doing quite a bit of the work at least initially. The group, Loving-Dominance, will explore the power exchange dynamic with those who prefer a more loving approach. (Please don't apply to join yet as I'm not sure I will do this. If I can find someone interested in helping, I will proceed.)

There was more but I'm being called away. I'll write more later.

(Artwork: "Ariadne" by Sir William Russell Flint)

Relax Those Sphincter Muscles

Seriously uptight, judgmental people really amuse me. Seriously uptight, judgmental people in the D/s world are the funniest of all. Initially. Then I begin to see the damage they do to the self-esteem of others who believe they once again have not lived up to society's expectations of them - first vanilla society and then D/s society. "If you're not X then your submission, your dominance isn't true or it isn't deep enough." Pfft.

Don't let your submissive or dominant self-image be damaged by those whose mask of arrogance covers a very insecure person. If you're happy and your partner is happy, that's true enough and deep enough for the two of you. That's all that matters.

Email Frustrations

For some reason, I am unable to get into my Yahoo email account. I'm not sure why, but it is a wee bit frustrating for me and may be for some of you. If you've written to me in the past two weeks and I haven't as yet responded, your emails are not accessible to me. I had forwarded all my gmail emails to that account as well, so I can't reach those either :(

The forwarding of my gmail to yahoo has been eliminated. so my gmail address (accessible via my blogger profile) is the best way to communicate with me.

This problem may be resolved in a day or so (it's happened before), but in the meantime if you have been patiently awaiting a reply, please resend your email to the gmail address.

Random Rumination

Jackson's blog has apparently been down for some time now. He's repaired the problem and has started posting again. He's recently begun a new relationship with a lady that I suspect has strong dominant tendencies. You might find it interesting to read about his journey.

Projection

I was thinking back today to some of my psych nursing classes from college. Some of you may have heard of ego defense mechanisms. As the phrase suggests, these are things we do to protect our ego. Some are healthy, some not. One particular defense mechanism sprang to mind after reading a blog post about intolerance.

"Projection:

Attributing one's thoughts or impulses to another person. In common use, this is limited to unacceptable or undesirable impulses. Examples: (1) a man, unable to accept that he has competitive or hostile feelings about an acquaintance, says, “He doesn’t like me.” (2) a woman, denying to herself that she has sexual feelings about a co-worker, accuses him, without basis, of flirt and described him as a “wolf.”

This defense mechanism is commonly over utilized by the paranoid. "

Source - Cross Creek Family Counseling Online

Dual Penetration

First She takes his mind
and makes it open,
submissive and sensitive.
She speaks and his body responds
with intense arousal.
Beads of sweat form
above Her lip as She strokes
and excites Herself.
When She can stand it
no longer,
She parts Her thighs
and enjoys the sexual tension
before She guides him inside.
This is yin and yang,
light and dark,
first as begun
then reversed in part.
Her penetration of him
goes in and out
with Her voice
in repetition.
His penetration of Her
is physical
and controlled
better and better.
When it is over,
they do it again.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

Another Personal Note

Thank you all for the sweet support left in the comments section on my last post and also for all the wonderful emails. Things are still very hectic and I haven't had time to respond individually, but I wanted to be sure and post here and let you know that I'm very appreciative and your support means a lot. You're wonderful.

A Personal Note To My Friends

I wanted to update my friends on a couple of things and this seemed the best place to do that. Apologies to the rest of you for the personal note.

Bill has had a pretty rough week with the chemo but that's not unusual at all. His spirits seem to be really good, though. We've been doing a lot of hypnosis focusing on relaxation and anxiety control. He naturally gets worried about what will happen to him and he also gets worried about being sick from the chemo. The hypnosis and guided imagery seem to really make a difference. I'm so glad that it does because it's a pretty helpless feeling to watch someone going through all that and feel as if you can't do anything.

I've been pretty sick this week but I'm doing better. I know a lot of you wonder about my frequent illnesses but there's no need to be overly concerned. I'm tough and can handle this :)

We are going today to find out how seriously ill my father is and what his prognosis and treatment options are, so I may be away a few days longer depending on what we learn this afternoon. Mom is hanging tough so far but I'm not sure how well she will do if the news is really bad. She's one incredibly strong lady so I hope she'll handle things ok. Dad is still pretty much living in denial-ville, so he's ok so far.

I'll respond to all your emails when I can. Don't feel you can't write to me now because things are tough - I am always happy to hear from my friends even if I can't respond right away. Hopefully this weekend I'll have time to write back. Mom and Dad are going to St. Louis to visit my brother and will be attending a Cardinals game with seats five rows from the field :) That'll be great for them and it'll hopefully give me a little free time.

There is a story or two about some wonderful toys that I want to share with you ;) Check back when you have the time.

We Remember

Haven't Forgotten

I haven't forgotten about blogging. For the past few days I've been very sick and now today Bill had his chemo. It will be a few days before I'm able to post again or respond to my email.

Pulling Strings

What's a Hypnodomme to do
when She creates a new way
to tease and torment you?

First She must prepare your mind
for the surprise that She plans
for you to ultimately find.

Then She should take you deep
to those places where She has trained you
to be the most submissive at Her feet.

When She has made your mind empty,
open and ready to obey Her every word,
that's the time to drive you erotically crazy.

You thought yourself aroused and safe
in the place where She brought you,
but now uncertain changes await.

Your excitement is reflected in Her voice
as She smiles and whispers commands
to the puppet that you are without any choice.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

The Lesson

As She walked along, Her mind wandered. As unlikely as it seemed, She was bored. Her slaves obeyed her implicitly. Her hypnotic skills had been tested and honed in every possible circumstance; no male --- no person --- could withstand Her hypnotic power. She needed new heights to scale --- another challenge. Perhaps it was time for Her to make the world a better place, and extend Her abilities in mystical hypnosis.

"Ponyboy." The word came from that deep part of Her that She had learned to trust. Ponyboy. That had the right flavor. But so limited! Making a man get down on hands and knees, bridle in mouth, to run around with Her mounted on his back. Not nearly challenging enough. Something with a retributive flavor. That broke new ground.
Yes.

As was often the case with Her ideas, the perfect subject presented himself. A cowboy, coming out of that bar. Cowboy hat, cowboy shirt, jeans, even chaps, and cowboy boots. And attached to those boots --- spurs. Instruments of cruelty. A perfect victim.

Her stride on her lovely legs lengthened. As they passed, she lurched sideways. A gentleman (in his own eyes), the cowboy touched his ten gallon hat and said, "Sorry, Ma'am."

"Ma'am". Her eyes burned with the insult, unintentional though it was, but she smiled. "Quite all right. Perhaps your eyes was momentarily caught by my pendant." She fingered it, making it move between her perfect breasts. "It often catches the eye of people. It is very beautiful, don't you think?"

"Yes, Ma'am." His eyes were already vacent, the confusion of whether to look at the jewel or her lovely breasts depotentiating his conscious mind.

"It is so lovely that it makes it hard to think. So very hard to think. Jewels seem to be out of story, don't they? They inspire dreams. Dreams of far away places. So far away now. It's easier to dream with your eyes closed." His eyes closed and he swayed. "Such a good boy. Dreaming now. Dreaming of being with Me. Of never leaving Me, the woman of your dreams. Dreams that can become reality. So deep in the dream now. So very deep. And you want to be with Me forever now, don't you, boy?"

He muttered now, so deep in her spell. "Yes, Ma'am."

Her voice sharpened. "From this time forward, you will call Me Mistress. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Mistress."

She glanced up and down the street. They were alone, but it seemed a bit public. There was an alley nearby. That would do well. "Follow me now, boy." He followed her docilely, down into the alley, out of sight. "What is your name, boy?"

"Tom, Mistress."

"Well, Tom, you want to be strong for Me now, just as I want you to be, don't you?" He nodded vacently. "And such strong legs, and such an incredibly strong rump. Your legs are strong right down to your hoofs." The terms were confusing him; a small wrinkle appeared between his brows. This led him deeper into Her trance. "Yes, Tom, so strong. You've always secretly envied those strong stallions, with their strong muscles and huge dicks, haven't you?" He nodded again, eyes still closed, but a small smile on his face. "Yes, such a long, strong dick, so well endowed, so long and thick you can service any mare in the pasture. You want a dick like that, don't you, Tom?" He nodded again, the smile bigger. "Then you must be hung like a horse. A huge, strong horse. The strongest stallion you have ever seen." His jeans tented, bulging now. "But it must be real, Tom. You must really *be* that stallion. You feel your muscles growing stronger, stronger, much stronger than a man's muscles. Your dick is so long and strong. Such a strong nose and mouth, a horse's head, not that small man's head." To her delight, it was actually working, his form was blurring in the dim alley light. "That's right, Tom, so strong for Me, wanting to obey, wanting that strength, that power of a horse's rump and muscles, that incredible rump, the strong back, the graceful neck." He was actually metamorphizing now, and She continued to talk, guiding him in the transformation that was both hypnotic and magical, born of Her power. Soon, much faster than she had expected, there was no longer a man standing there, but a magnificent horse, large and powerful.

She started walking, and the horse followed as if it already wore a bridle. "And you belong only to Me, obey only Me, isn't that right, Tom?" The horse blew air out between it's teeth in a sound not quite like a neigh, and nodded its huge head. "No matter who tries to break you and make you obey, they will fail, because you obey only Me, isn't that right, Tom?" This time the horse whinnied, and nodded again. "Such a good boy. I know just the place for you."

The customers of the country bar down the road were puzzled by the torn shirt and jeans in the alley. Most of all, they were puzzled by the spurs left there, bent out of shape, as if discarded. Spurs were worth money. No cowboy worth a saddle to sit on would discard such spurs.

The next morning the hands were surprised by a new bronc in the corral. He had never been shod; the ferrier had to trim the huge hoofs to fit him. For the rest of the day they tried to at least start the long, tedious business of breaking him to the saddle. The huge stallion proved resistant to the most skillful bronc buster on the ranch. They continued to wonder where he had come from.

They also wondered at the name on the papers that had come with him. Ponyboy Tom.

(c) 2006, Hypnoboth

FemDom Romance

Isn't this an amazing piece of art? I have used it before, but no other painting says "FemDom Romance" to me quite the way this painting does.

Richard from Down On My Knees has created another website that I thought you might find of interest. FemDom Romance celebrates love among dominant women and submissive men. It's the perfect companion to his FemDom Dating site that I mentioned a week or so ago.

Alphabet Soup

Female domination. Femdom. Dominance and submission. BDSM (Bondage, Disicipline, Sadomasochism). Exciting terms to some. Totally scary to those who may be unfamiliar with them. What do they mean?

To help clarify, I pulled a few definitions from Dr. Gloria Brame's website:

"Dominant: a woman or man who assumes sexual (and possibly more far-reaching) control over a submissive partner." (A female dominant is often referred to as a FemDom for short).

"D&S: also known as Dominance and Submission, DS, D/S, or D/s. Sometimes called "Power Relationships" (see "power exchange" and "total power exchange" below). D&S may be used interchangeably with B&D or SM; or it may be used to refer to a power relationship, where one partner is the sexual dominant and the other is the submissive."

"B&D. Acronym for Bondage & Discipline, also written as BD or B/D, and sometimes combined with SM to form BDSM. B&D is an old expression and is still used fairly interchangeably with D&S and SM, but some people define BD as bondage and discipline without pain, and also without defined power roles."

"BDSM. This portmanteau covers most SM/fetish-related kinks. It is a popular way of linguistically uniting the various types of players whose actual practices may differ."

"SM: also written as S/M, S/m, and S&M. The abbreviation for sadomasochism." - Gloria Brame

While some female dominants are very much into sadomasochism, many are not. (Sadomasochism is sadism, a deriving of sexual pleasure from infliction of pain and/or humiliation and masochism, a deriving of sexual pleasure from receiving pain and/or humiliation) It is entirely possible to control (or dominate) someone without ever inflicting any pain and without ever humiliating anyone. For some women this is a very important distinction.

In previous entries I've mentioned that I have at times enjoyed smacking a partner on the behind and/or causing nipple pain to increase his sexual pleasure. I've also enjoyed causing him to squirm just a little with slightly embarrassed pleasure. This doesn't in any way mean that I had to do these things to control him. Those were buttons that were fun to push primarily because of the reaction that was elicited. I get no thrill strictly from the act - it's all about the reaction. I don't have to discipline him with pain either. He does what I ask because he wants to please me. None of these things - pain, humiliation, physical discipline - are necessary for me to control him.

I'm not interested in the slightest in striking anyone until there are bruises or whelps, in making him a human ashtray or toilet, in humiliating him in any way that would make him feel less than me. We are equal - he chooses to submit and I choose to take control.

I point this out because I frequently receive emails from men who have beseeched their wives to dominate them and have been summarily refused because their ladies were unable to see themselves as the sort of woman who would hurt their partner or do things they consider to be less than appealing. I think in some of these situations, the alphabet soup of terms seriously hindered communication.

As I mentioned in a previous post, it isn't necessary for me to do such things in order to dominate my partner. I am a female dominant who is kind, who says please and thank you, who doesn't raise my voice, etc, yet I am able with just a few words to bring my man to his knees in a way that is not only completely consensual but very mutually satisfying. Other women can easily do the same without fear of having to become someone they are not. There's not need to let misconceptions over phraseology rob two people of the joys of a power exchange relationship.

Do Me and Do Me Now

"Dear wife/girlfriend/woman I don't even know: I want to submit to you. By wanting to submit to you I mean I want all my kinky sexual buttons to be pushed when I want and how I want without any regard for what you may want and without any real effort to please you or to even learn what would please you. When can you make this happen?"

I'd comment further, but the people who need to hear this won't recognize themselves and those who don't need to hear it won't need further comment.

Just venting :)

What's The Story?

Concrete. Cold on my skin. Bound. Chained. Can't move.

What happened? I was at a party. We were laughing. Someone was talking, and I was laughing. I can't remember. Something about the power of the mind, how it can be stronger than steel, stronger than chains. That's right. Her. She was saying how she can bind anyone more powerfully than chains. I laughed. So stupid. No one can break chains, and all you have to do without them is move. So she challenged me. She could bind me so I can't move. All I had to do was look into her eyes. I was happy to do that. So blue, so deep. I didn't even pay attention to what she was saying.

But how did I get here? Naked? Chained? Bound? This doesn't have anything to do with the bet. These are real chains. I can't move no matter how hard I try. Why are they all laughing at me? Is it funny that I can't break the chains on my wrists, my ankles, my waist? Is it funny that someone has stripped me naked? What's so damned funny?

What's so damned funny?

(c) 2006 Hypnoboth

Here's to You Mrs. Robinson

I'm beginning a list of "must rent" movies and I want to view some where the female lead is strong and sexy. Any suggestions? It doesn't matter if I have seen them or not, whether they're new or old, etc. I'm planning to rent them again and review them. If I like them, I'm going to add them to a list and use it on my website.

The Graduate is first on my list. I've never seen it, but from what I've heard, Mrs Robinson seems to fit the description of strong and sexy.

Thanks in advance for your help :)

Hypnotic Fantasies

Exploring your fantasies through hypnosis is absolutely a sizzling hot thing to do. As long as you trust your hypnotist, you can in your mind become anyone you want to be and do anything you want to do just for the time of the trance. If the hypnotist is good, it's an amazingly vivid and extremely exciting experience. Imagine the possibilities!

I hear a lot of fantasies. I've yet to hear one that totally grossed me out or made me think "this person belongs in a mental hospital" and unless I hear something that includes kids, I doubt I will ever think that. Fantasies are not necessarily things we would ever do - they're just exciting things to think about. What's so wrong with that?

One of my fantasies is about having a male harem ;) For the service part, picture Cleopatra. For the sex part, think of all the fun I could have with bondage (mmmm - yummy slave boys in chains and cock collars). And tease and denial... teasing several men at a time, having them begging me for release or to touch my body in some way. Yum. And two or three very lucky slave boys who are allowed to pleasure me. Yum Yum Yum.

I'm laughing now because I started out writing all that to encourage you to share one of your fantasies and after I started writing it I got so lost in the fantasy and so turned on I almost forgot why I was making the post ;)

Anyway... I was thinking when I started writing all this that I'd love to hear one or two of the things you fantasize about. I'll accept anonymous comments on this.

(Fantasies don't have to be about hypnosis to be explored via hypnosis.)

Pergatory

If I could remember,
why I worship You -
it would become a harmony.

I replay the memory of Your words
stroking my hearing,
touching my taste and skin.

Your perfume excites surrender.
I remember other times and sins
when I knelt before You.

There is tension in my loins.
I am stretched thin in obedience.
My mind has no will but Yours.

You are a perfect lesson to learn
and my confession turns silence
and night into day.

I have opened myself and I believe.
I will not falter or fail.
Tell me what You need.

(c) 2006, william the submissive poet

Missing!

Today I noticed one of my favorite blogs missing from my list of daily reads. It may sound weird to most of you, but I find I am fond of some of the people whose blogs I read. Maybe it's because they're so open about things that are not easy to share even with close friends or family.

Pleaseletme, I want you especially to know I'll miss reading your thoughts and that I hope your journey with your Princess continues to be happy and fulfilling.