The Gift

It's late... or early... at any rate I can't sleep. I've been lying here listening to music (mostly Christmas music) and thinking about a lot of different things. I should be answering emails or writing something witty for my group, but I am just not focusing for some reason. My mind keeps drifting back to the lyrics of one of the first songs I heard tonight.

The Gift

- by Colin Raye, Jim Brickman

Winter snow is falling down
Children laughing all around
Lights are
turning on like a fairy tale come true
Sittin’ by the fire we made
You’re the answer when I prayed
I would find someone and baby I found
you

And all I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you more
everyday
You saved my heart from being broken apart
You gave your love
away
And I’m thankful everyday
For the gift

Watching as you
softly sleep
What I’d give if I could keep
Just this moment if only time
stood still
But the colors fade away
And the years will make us gray
But baby in my eyes you’ll still be beautiful

And all I want is to
hold you forever
All I need is you more everyday
You saved my heart from
being broken apart
You gave your love away
And I’m thankful everyday
For the gift

All I want is to hold you forever
All I need is you
more everyday
You saved my heart from being broken apart
You gave your
love away
And I’m thankful everyday
Can’t find the words to say
Thank you for the gift

There's so much tenderness and love in these words. Perhaps the lines that touched me most were "But the colors fade away, And the years will make us gray, But baby in my eyes you’ll still be beautiful". Those are the words to touch a woman's heart. Maybe not all women but at least to me and to my friends. We want to know you find us beautiful and you always will. I think women who feel that way are far more confident, sexier, and much more likely to want to take the initiative to control their men sexually because sexy and confident is what it takes to feel comfortable taking control.

You don't have to write beautiful lyrics, but you can say and do things that show you love her and think she's sexy - just like she is - not just when she's dominating you. I remember when I found out that my chronic illness was getting a bit worse. I talked to Rook and told him that I wondered if maybe it wouldn't be better for him to move on to a relationship with someone who was healthier. He didn't hesitate, but instead quietly asked, "Remember that line from that Steel Magnolias movie you love so much? 'I'd rather have fifteen minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.' I'm not going anywhere as long as you want me to be here." How could I help but to feel loved, desired, and beautiful to him after that? Even though we were already involved in a FemDom relationship, that statement and his actions that demonstrated he meant what he said served to empower me even more.

If you're in a relationship and you are wanting to encourage your wife to consider taking a more dominant role, ask yourself - am I doing everything I can to help her see how loved she is? Does she see how confident and sexy I think she is - just like she is right now? If not, isn't it time to show her?