More On Hypnotic Control

In response to my post About Masturbation and Hypnotic Control lh asked, "Can i please ask you to elaborate on how you use hypnosis in this context? If your hypnotic ministrations make him want to pleasure himself, then how does it prevent him from doing so?"

Thanks for the question, lh :) I love it when my readers ask questions because not only do they make me think, but they let me know that my words are making someone else think as well. I'll try to explain a little more in depth.

Whenever we first became a couple, I knew that he was a very strong man who wanted to submit, but not to all women - just to me. He's not a passive person in any way and doesn't respond well to be told what to do by someone who hasn't a right to do so. I love that strength but I knew that at times it would make it difficult for him to submit even to me. That was ok, though, because I had a plan ;)

During our early hypnosis sessions, I began giving suggestions that were simple, but powerful. "I know that you have a deep desire to please me and to feel my control. You know I love controlling you." (These statements were givens - statements that I knew were true and that would put his mind into the mode of saying yes for the actual suggestions.) "Your obedience is very pleasing to me and pleasing me feels so very good. The more you obey, the more you please me. The more you please me, the more pleasure you will feel. You'll find yourself enjoying delightful feelings of pleasure whenever you do even those simple every day tasks that you do for me." Clearly submissive men find pleasure at pleasing their Lady, but this is something that extends past a scene or sexual interaction. Imagine how good it would feel to experience a small amount of erotic pleasure whenever you're doing the dishes ;)

I didn't, however, simply use the hypnosis sessions to encourage his obedience. I believe I could have, but I enjoyed toying with his mind just in casual conversation and in situations where a hypnosis session just wasn't feasible. Often we would talk about how much it excited me when he obeyed me - even in the little things. This definitely pushed his buttons because he really likes knowing that he excites me. I remember calling him one day when he was at work and asking him if he had completed a task that I'd ask him to do. When he responded in the affirmative, I asked him if he knew what his obedience did to me. After he responded that he did (and thus reinforcing those 'givens" in his mind), I began to describe just how much it excited me - how wet I was, how much I wished he was with me right then, and what all I would do with him if he was. I went on to detail every place I was touching while thinking about that and how good it all felt. Soon I was moaning softly and clearly very much enjoying myself. By calling him at work and talking to him in such a manner, I used a couple of his kinks to reinforce his obedience and the pleasure associated with it.

Then after some time had passed, I began to also focus hypnotically on the bliss of surrender. He's in charge all day long so it feels wonderful to let go with me. After awhile, it was clear that pleasing me and allowing me to be in control was really important to him on a much deeper level than sexuality alone. And.. it honestly went much deeper for me, too. Being in control in a relationship is something I want and need - it makes me feel content. Because of this, we'd found our win/win place. Since then, he's often said he would do anything I asked, and I believe him. He's proven that he meant it on a number of occasions. His acceptance of periods of chastity in spite of his sexual arousal is just one example :)

(Addendum - I'd like to add that controlling an activity doesn't always mean forbidding it. There are times when it's ok for him to self-pleasure and others when it pleases me that he doesn't. It's my call and therein lies the control.)