Female Supremacy
I've been thinking a bit lately about the issue of female supremacy. I know that some in the D/s lifestyle embrace the concept that women are the superior sex but this isn't an ideology that I can accept. I'm not superior in any way to my fella nor is he to me. We each have our strengths and our weaknesses. He's an intelligent, articulate, educated professional who is more than able to take care of himself. He doesn't need me, he wants me. He doesn't have to kneel, he chooses to kneel. If I thought he was inferior to me, I'm certain I wouldn't have been attracted to him in any way. I truly enjoyed the challenge of making him mine.
If I am superior in any way, it would be because the gift of his submission elevates me to a higher place. (Smiles - sappy sounding, but I believe it's true.)
posted by Lady Julia @ 7:38 PM
11 Comments
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11 Comments:
Now you see, Lady Julia, that's why I keep coming back here. Your so refreshingly honest. How many dommes would ever say females aren't really superior to males.
I agree and, truth be known, most of us probably do as well. The term "power exchange" implies that it is a voluntary action. "Submissibe" is not synonymous with "inferior".
Thank you for your insights.
the way i see it is that when you compare the genders as a whole, Women are greatly outdoing men which causes me to think that Women are superior, but there are enough smart men and dumb Women out there to create an exception that almost swallows the rule. lol
Dear Lady Julia,
i really appreciate Your elegant and well reasoned position on this issue. Fundamental fairness and the willingness to speak Your mind are qualities i admire about You. This issue of gender superiority has troubled me recently while reading blogs and LFA material. It has caused me to lose respect for some, and i must admit that i probably would not have maintained an interest in D/s if it weren't for Your wise words on this topic as well as the words of many of those who contributed in your forum.
On the one hand i am in love with the female gender and have to be careful not to deify females i adore as objects of worship - seriously.
And i think it is fair to say that the ideology of female supremacy tends to feed the male submissive erotic fantasy - of being conquered by a powerful Domme. Taken to the extreme, the requirement to worship a Domme as supreme Goddess of the Universe is not entirely unheard of in some BDSM corners.
But to me gender superiority isn't the right question to focus on. Why not? I believe there are a few reasons:
1) Outside of fantasy, it neglects our common humanity and can be a divisive topic, tending to cause one gender a loss of self-esteem while fostering arrogance in the other. Shouldn't the question instead be "how much more wonderful we sound as a duet, rather than as soloists" or "isn't the dance so much more beautiful and inspiring when it is complementary and symbiotic?"
2) To have a definitive fully acceptable answer to the gender question requires at minimum something we really don't have access to:
- An unbiased all-knowing 3rd party to establish fair criteria and judge both genders across the span of history based upon those criteria. If the criteria are arbitrarily focused on the ability to naturally grow facial hair and fart unabashedly - males are clearly superior. But then the question of meaningfulness and fairness of the criteria arises. One could successfully challenge this notion of male superiority since the criteria are so narrowly defined. It has been said that by any meaningful measure of criteria, females are superior. Ah, but who determines what is meaningful? Who sets the criteria? Some Dommes might be inclined to say "why the female does, of course". But the "unbiased" requirement remains unsatisfied.
3) If the supremacy ideology is essentially about conquering the world with female dominance in order to save the human race and a world spinning out of control from all the evils and failures of the patriarchy, a sense of urgency may tend toward another bias problem. A bias can put a spin on everything from how scripture is deciphered to how studies about the human brain are interpreted. When an ideology is fully embraced, the drive to amass evidence in its favor can hinder an honest search for truth.
But i am extremely happy and proud that strong minded, highly engaged, compassionate women are increasingly taking center stage and leading responsibly in positions of authority. i consider this trend to be a very good thing.
My only fear is that in some cases the pendulum will swing the other direction. That is - in natural reaction to sexist treatment at the hands of arrogant and irresponsible males, some affected women could find themselves reacting to and making the very same mistakes.
Thank You so much for sharing Your perspective on this topic.
robert
Absolutely. Spot on. This seems to me to be the essence of LFA, where a male chooses to honour a woman, as distinct from male self denigration, which stems from disatisfacton with one's being. If i am not 'worthy', then why on earth should She find me interesting?
Once again you prove to me that YOU are one of the most insightful people out there, among women and men alike, who are involved in this lifestyle. I personally think that women are "better" at certain things (such as relationships) and men are "better" at others. In our relationship, neither Goddess V nor I actually "need" the other to survive in this world. We are each perfectly capable of living without the support of the other. BUT we choose not to. I choose to worship Goddess V and allow her to control me with Her authority. In so doing I elevate Her above myself. The fact that I do this voluntarily out of my love for Her, is what turns Her on and encourages Her to lead our relationship. Are either one of us superior to the other in the true sense of the word? I think not even though Goddess V is inclined to disagree. But it really doesn't matter. What does matter is that our relationship is stronger and happier than it has ever been.
A beautiful post Lady Julia.
"If I am superior in any way, it would be because the gift of his submission elevates me to a higher place."
Not sappy at all. I think it is very profound.
I think female supremacy is the perfect thing for the man who will submit to any woman willing to order him around. After all, inherent in FS ideology is the idea that all women are superior to all men. Therefore, any Domme will do ya,".
But what woman wants that? Where is the idea of her being special? It doesn't really exist in Female Supremacy, because she is only special because she is the one who currently pays attention to him.
Dear Lady Julia,
I also do not think this is sappy at all. It is touching, and it is lovely. Your care and your love comes through this brief post. Your husband is a very luck man.
Very well said Lady Julia.
Destiny
I had not read this for some time. Since Destiny made her comment, it moved the topic back to your "My readers are discussing" section. (That is a section I really like = thank you.)
Your reasoning is sound and healthy. It does not tear down someone else to build yourself up. Any relationship in which someone's self esteem is damage or diminished is unhealthy and can border on the abusive.
Your logic is flawed. Because you are not superior to your "fella", then women aren't superior to men. This is a non sequitur. With most exceptions women are far superior to men and men are really only here to procreate. Now that we have sperm banks, we know longer even need men.
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